So I thought I’d slip in a lame update about what has been recently going on in my life.
I still can’t believe that we just started our mid-terms. we only have 2 weeks left before Eid holiday, which will leave us with just one week before finals.
Uh, who cares anyway? My underachieving self is not bothered..never will be.
ok that’s a lie. I haven’t been this anxious in my entire life! I never knew I could get this apprehensive! I just discovered a side of me that I’m seriously thinking of shooting..right between the eyes! There is always something stupid that keeps me up at night.. and even the couple of hours of sleep I get are not peaceful. I keep dreaming of missing deadlines, screwing up assignments, embarrassing myself in front of a class full of teenage girls. And if it’s not a very bad dream, I’d dream that I’ve overslept and missed an important exam, just to wake up and find that I’ve woken up way before the alarm has gone off.
I don’t know why am I panicking like this.. I’m usually never bothered. And it’s not like I’m doing badly in my studies, on the contrary; My grades are pretty good (if not excellent), and my past two evaluations weren’t bad at all. So what am I so freaked out about?
The stress is affecting me physically too, I’ve been sick for almost a month now. I keep relapsing.. it’s so bad that my mother is demanding at least one SMS per day..just to make sure I’m well enough to type.
I come online in my not-so-free time, just to satisfy my procrastination, and keep my mind off of things..or at least try to.
I can’t wait for November to end! I wanna go back home, and get some of my strength back for finals.
I’ve been sleep deprived for the past couple of months it’s just..so..very..tiring..
Ever since I was a kid, when I’m in desperate need of some peace, I usually get one my mother’s recently worn (lesos) scarves, and bury my face in it. her sweet comforting smell on it literally makes every muscle on my body relax, and an overwhelming sensation of peace overcomes me..a reassuring feeling that everything is going to be alright, and all I have to do is just close my eyes..
and I sleep..The wheels in my brain finally stop. no nightmares..no dreams..just a black void of peace.
I wish I had one right now.
8 comments:
You need to work it out as a flexible routine!
"Ever since I was a kid, when I’m in desperate need of some peace, I usually get one my mother’s recently worn (lesos) scarves, and bury my face in it. her sweet comforting smell on it literally makes every muscle on my body relax, and an overwhelming sensation of peace overcomes me..a reassuring feeling that everything is going to be alright, and all I have to do is just close my eyes..
and I sleep..The wheels in my brain finally stop. no nightmares..no dreams..just a black void of peace.
I wish I had one right now."
The weird "awww" effect (up in my head of course) kept getting bigger as I went on reading that paragraph. =)
You're stronger than you think. You've climbed the highest mountains and swam the seven seas. Remember? No? Well now you have.
nightface oh yes of course..i forgot that YOU happen to have the best, most flexible routine.
but you know, i think you're going to have to lecture me again.. hmm.. lets see..
how about 8 pm, tonight? =P
ME! haha, thanks! that pepped me up. =)
Well, I am not complaining =P
nightface illi y7awil ynaket
inzain! =P
aww
you'll be fine inshallah, me no worried about you
just wish your sickness goes away real soon
hehe you should include your mums leso in your packing bag next time
that's so cute its like your security blanket ^_^
I'd tell you to do some yoga if you can
its sooo relaxing really
followed by some strength training or aerobics
mm or aromatherapy! haha you'll float into a trance.. i've got lilies next to me right now, love the smell.
you can do that in your bath^
you know all that troubles in bubbles thing ne :p
but theres just 2 more weeks then you'll be home! =D so i guess there might not be any need for any of this lol
wish you all the best. take care! gambatte ^_^
Lily it is like a secuirty blanket! i think i'm the oldest person to have a security blanket xD
i'm almost healthy again.. thanks! ^_^
i don't do yoga..but i meditate every once in awhile?
it is good. i just don't have the time (half a lie)
less than two weeks! and counting! =D
*hugs her* i miss you!
The funny thing about finals is that they always seem to go well in the end.
You'll be fine.
JD
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